The Wisdom of Guarding One’s Tongue
A story from the *Zizhi Tongjian* tells of a banquet where寇準 (Kou Zhun) had soup staining his beard. 丁謂 (Ding Wei) gently wiped it clean, only to be mocked: “As a minister of state, is your duty to wipe your master’s beard?”
That remark planted deep resentment. Though spoken as a jest, it cut too sharply. Ding Wei later allied with others once scorned by Kou Zhun, slandering him before the emperor. Eventually, even the ruler deemed Kou Zhun’s words too harsh. His political career crumbled, leading to exile and a lonely death.
Kou Zhun’s tragedy began with an unguarded tongue. While Ding Wei’s character was flawed, public mockery only breeds enmity and revenge.
Confucius said, “Do not impose on others what you do not desire yourself.” Words are blades—invisible yet wounding. Today’s slight may become tomorrow’s vengeance. To speak with restraint is not weakness, but wisdom.